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Entertaining Your In-laws

A simple plan for dealing with that weekend visit. (Big smiles!)

 

Your mother-in-law is a nag who noses around the house and questions everything you do. Your father-in-law is the strong, silent type who's actually more silent than strong. When their forces combine, the two have the power to drive you absolutely nuts. But they did somehow create the wonder that is your darling husband, so hosting them for a weekend won't be too traumatizing, right? Read on, and we’ll show you how to survive the next 48 hours unscathed -- or at least how to escape with only minor injuries.

Friday Night: The Arrival

Whether they arrive by plane, train, or automobile, be sure to have refreshments ready as they walk in the door. Ask about their trip and say how glad you are to have them for the weekend. Keep their mouths full to limit the complaining.

[Nest Note] Find out which drinks your father-in-law enjoys and have the ingredients on hand to mix his signature martini, or keep a few of his preferred bottles of beer chilling in the fridge. Does your mother-in-law have a thing for French cheeses? Put a couple of her favorite varieties on a platter with fruit and crackers. They’ll notice and appreciate your effort to serve things they like.

Once they've settled in, sit down to dinner. You can either go all out with a home-cooked feast or order in a few pizzas for a casual evening. Turn the television off and make an effort to keep the conversation flowing. Is your mother-in-law an avid reader? Ask her what books she’s enjoyed lately. Encourage your mate to tell his father about the great golf game he had last weekend.

Saturday Morning: Breakfast

If you want to keep things low-key, you can just offer an array of bagels or hot or cold cereal. But you might want to try creating a bonding experience with your mother-in-law by asking her to help out. Tell her you were thinking of making pancakes and see if she wants to show you the secret to her famous boysenberry recipe. You could even get your father-in-law into the game by busting out the super-duper juicer you got as a wedding gift and letting him whip up some fresh-squeezed OJ.

Saturday Afternoon: Play Time

Hop in the car with your spouse and gang, and take a scenic tour of the town. Check out the houses in nearby neighborhoods and point out the places you and your mate often go. Make the in-laws feel as though they’re getting an exclusive peek into your lives. Even if you don’t think it’s terribly exciting, they definitely will!

If it’s a nice day, take a stroll or head to a nearby park or even the zoo. Grab sandwiches for lunch and shop around for a while. You might even consider catching a movie. Even though it’s not the most social activity, a movie is entertainment without effort, and it'll give you something to talk about should the conversation stall later on.

[Nest Note] Does your mother-in-law have an eye for art? Take her to some local galleries or a museum. Ask your mate how she usually spends her free time (or don’t be shy – ask her what her interests are yourself!), and incorporate some of those preferred activities into the weekend.

Saturday Night: Out on the Town

So your in-laws may not be the most exciting duo you’ve ever entertained on a Saturday night, but you should still go out of your way to show them a good time. (And make sure it’s their idea of a good time, not yours.) Make reservations at an upscale restaurant and pop open a bottle of wine with dinner. Enjoy a leisurely meal and make an effort to really get to know this new set of parents -- beyond the intrusive habits that drive you up the wall. Have you ever heard the story of how they met? Your mother-in-law may brag about her son incessantly, but has she regaled you with the funny moments from his childhood?

Don't be afraid to put yourself in the spotlight too. Share some new things they may not know about you. After all, you’re more than just their son’s wife -- you’re a whole new daughter to love!

Sunday Morning: Brunch and Goodbyes

Whether last night turned out to be a fantastic bonding experience or an absolute bust, you may feel like you’ve exhausted all possible topics of conversation. If so, brunch with a couple of your closest friends is a great way to fix this. It'll give the in-laws a further glimpse into your married life, and it lets you off the hook for digging up new things to talk about. Keep things casual with a buffet-style spread of breads, muffins, jams, and fruit, and offer to pack up any leftovers for their journey home.

When the time comes for them to head out, be sure to thank them for their visit and tell them how wonderful it was to spend time with them. Say you look forward to seeing them again (even if you don’t mean it), and, finally, make sure you hold in that sigh of relief until they’re completely out the door!

See more: couple issues, Love/Sex


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