Q.
I'm heavier than my husband, and I find it quite difficult to be on top of him during intercourse. This, however, is the position he prefers. Is there anything I can do to make being on top easier and more enjoyable for me?
A.
Let me begin by saying that I'm delighted your husband likes to have you on top. The reason for this is that more women find that reaching climax is easier on top than in any other position. What we need to do is get you comfortable! I'm not sure where you make love, but let's begin in the bedroom. Turn it into a seductive boudoir with subtle lighting, some sensual candles, and lots of lovely, soft, silky cushions piled up on the bed. Build a little love nest that you both can nestle in. When it comes time for you to get on top, tell him you want to take your time, and then slip some comfy cushions underneath your knees, elbows, or wherever else you find it gets uncomfortable. Then, while on top, feel free to slightly alter your position from time to time to diffuse any discomfort and also to gain differing sexual sensations. It takes trust to communicate honestly about such things. If you find it hard to discuss this with your husband, try talking about it outside the bedroom when you're both feeling relaxed.
Nestpert: Dr. Pam Spurr, author of Make Love All Night & Talk to Him in the Morning and Naughty Tricks and Sexy Tips: A Couple's Guide to Uninhibited Sexual Pleasure
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