You might be married, but it doesn’t mean you’ve left dating in the dust. Although you’re not out on the prowl anymore, it doesn’t mean you can’t (and don’t) date your friends. After all, one of the first relationships you cultivate after marriage is with the people we’ll call “The Couple You’re Basically Dating.” You know -- the married twosome you see more often than anyone else.
When it’s good, it’s really good. You share Friday nights out, weekend DIY projects, and, best of all, no sexual tension. But what if your favorite couple cheats on you? You may not have to put a ring (or two) on this couple’s respective fingers, but the commitment is there, and it stings nonetheless when you unceremoniously break up.
This begs the question: How do you know when your “it couple” has started to stray? Here are six signs:
- The first and most obvious: They stop returning your phone calls.
- You’ve been spending every Friday night together for four years, and they’ve been too busy for the last four months.
- You make plans/extend the invite more often than they do, like 90 percent of the time.
- They’re talking about (and practically mooning over) another couple they’ve been hanging out with lately.
- You see them out on the town with the other couple -- repeatedly.
- They had a baby -- one, two, twelve months ago -- and you never hear from them. But, hey, give them a break and keep them in the loop. They're cheating on you with their baby! You might be in the same situation someday.
Now that we’ve gone over the signs and symptoms, don’t forget the cure. Most of these issues can be cleared up with a little communication. So let go of the resentment, check in with your friends, and find out what’s been going on in their lives. With a little bit of understanding, you’ll get back to being BFFs in no time!
by Margaret O'Malley
6/19/08
See more:
couple issues,
Love/Sex