Rut #1: Watching TV During Dinner
Why it's bad: Yeah, we know...it's the season finale! But ever heard of face-time? You can't connect with your eyes glued to the tube.
Bust it: Set aside an hour for
one-on-one dinners sans TV, phone, or Blackberry three nights a week. You'll feel closer within days.
Rut #2: Going Too Long Without Sex
Why it's bad: If the amount of
sex you're used to having starts to slide, you get used to the decreased intimacy, and can go even longer without wanting that closeness.
Bust it: Don't wait until you
feel like doing it. Initiate sex just because. This will jump-start your feelings so you'll crave it more often.
Rut #3: Going a Whole Workday Without Talking
Why it's bad: You may start growing apart emotionally after disconnecting so much during the entire workweek.
Bust it: Initiate daily contact with a quick "How's your day?" email. Postwork, pick up their fave dessert or call from the store to see if they need something.
Rut #4: Not Fighting
Why it's bad: It might seem like staying mum is better, but not talking out issues when they first bubble up makes 'em fester.
Bust it: Be calm but firm. Say, "It hurts my feelings when ______. I was hoping we could figure out a new way to handle the situation together."
Rut #5: Going out More with Friends Than with Your Spouse
Why it's bad: It sends the message that your friends only get to see the "fun" you, and your spouse is well, just the person you live with.
Bust it: Still go out with your crew, but switch it up by making your mate your partner-in-crime for your wild night out. They may just surprise you.
Nestpert Susan Fletcher, Ph.D., author of Parenting in the Smart Zone -- Judy Koutsky
See More: Couple Issues , Love & Sex