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how to: deal with issues

Every marriage is bound to encounter a few bumps along the road, especially when you're first starting out. We're here to help you out with solutions to couples issues and common newlywed arguments. First, find out about the tried-and-true stuff your parents probably wish they'd known. We've sorted out the newlywed "rules" you can ignore from the relationship mistakes you need to avoid. Learn the right way to handle a fight and the solutions to the most common newlywed arguments. We've also got help for couples issues that are specific to the modern marriage. For example, the four rules of Facebook for couples, how to deal when you're married to a metrosexual, and handling coworker crushes. You can also read our expert Q&A for dealing with all kinds of couples issues. Find tips on making friends as a couple, managing work stress as a pair, and avoiding common newlywed arguments about stuff like cleaning and entertaining. We'll help you solve issues with everyone -- your honey, your couple friends, your in-laws -- and find solutions that work in every part of your life, from the bedroom to the office. From whether it's okay to tell friends about your issues to breaking out of a sex rut, we've got you covered. And don't forget your fellow Nesties! We've pulled together lists of real couple gripes and likes, Nesties' marriage secrets, and their most ridiculous fights -- you're sure to relate to something! Or find even more sympathetic ears with our relationships message board.

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Friend, Interrupted

Does it seem like you're losing your pals to parenthood? Read on. We'll tell you how to navigate this awkward phase and strengthen the bond between you and your buds with babies.

The Issue: Your girlfriend can't seem to utter a single non-baby sentence.

How to Deal: Your instinct may be to clam up, because your friend is too knee-deep in BS (baby stuff) to be interested in your funny work story. But remember when you were house shopping and were so consumed by everything from adjustable mortgages to home inspections that your friend's hookup saga was actually a welcome break? 'Nuff said, now speak up.

The Issue: You feel left out of the "plus-one club."

How to Deal: If your prego or mommy friends are getting together without you, don't assume they've intentionally singled you out. In fact, on some level, they could be sparing you. Do you really want to referee a debate on the merits of the Medela versus the Ameda breast pump? Your pals are on hardcore fact-finding missions right now. In short, this has nothing to do with you.

The Issue: You're at baby showers every other weekend.

How to Deal: Hey, you're human. Don't feel guilty for not wanting to spend every Saturday cooing over onesies. If skipping a few fetes isn't an option, remember -- you don't have to stay for the whole party. Give your friend a heads up that you'll be slipping out early, then feel free to jet once she's opened your gift.

The Issue: You start comparing -- and feel like you're falling behind in life.

How to Deal: Have a heart-to-heart with your honey. Are the two of you really ready to take on that kind of responsibility? Do you want a baby now, or are you just feeling left out? You didn't move in together because all your friends were doing it (right?) and wouldn't basing your baby plans on them be way, well...insane? Bottom line: Peer pressure just might be the worst reason ever for becoming a parent.

The Issue: She's cleaned up her act, big time -- which is super. But she seems to expect you to do the same.

How to Deal: Your once fun-loving friend seems to have morphed into a total hall monitor type (i.e. "Do you know what coffee does to your adrenals?") The reason? Her health -- and that of her baby -- is her numero-uno now, and that's a good thing. So if she occasionally comments on, say, your french fry intake, take it for the loving gesture it is. Can't live with the tsk-tsking? Sweetly explain that you'll deal with your vices on your own time.

Click here to find out if you have toxic friends
How to make couples friends

-- The Nest Editors

See More: Couple Issues , Love & Sex