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how to: deal with issues

Every marriage is bound to encounter a few bumps along the road, especially when you're first starting out. We're here to help you out with solutions to couples issues and common newlywed arguments. First, find out about the tried-and-true stuff your parents probably wish they'd known. We've sorted out the newlywed "rules" you can ignore from the relationship mistakes you need to avoid. Learn the right way to handle a fight and the solutions to the most common newlywed arguments. We've also got help for couples issues that are specific to the modern marriage. For example, the four rules of Facebook for couples, how to deal when you're married to a metrosexual, and handling coworker crushes. You can also read our expert Q&A for dealing with all kinds of couples issues. Find tips on making friends as a couple, managing work stress as a pair, and avoiding common newlywed arguments about stuff like cleaning and entertaining. We'll help you solve issues with everyone -- your honey, your couple friends, your in-laws -- and find solutions that work in every part of your life, from the bedroom to the office. From whether it's okay to tell friends about your issues to breaking out of a sex rut, we've got you covered. And don't forget your fellow Nesties! We've pulled together lists of real couple gripes and likes, Nesties' marriage secrets, and their most ridiculous fights -- you're sure to relate to something! Or find even more sympathetic ears with our relationships message board.

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How to Plug Back Into Each Other ASAP

Feeling a little disconnected these days?

Photo: Veer

Whether you’ve both been working a lot or you’re overwhelmed with home renovations, or you’ve just been so wrapped up in busy schedules that your relationship has taken second or third place, try these tips to recharge your relationship.

Get Away
Even if it’s just a weekend at a bed-and-breakfast on the other side of town, leaving home and all the stress behind will help you to focus on each other and connect again. It’s important to take time for just the two of you to be alone and together, and it’s hard to do that when you’ve got a million reminders of everything else you need to do.

Return to Your Roots
What did you love to do together when you first began dating? What sorts of things really got you in the mood, if you know what we mean? Go back to the things that turned you on or made you laugh or smile when you were just getting to know each other -- whether it’s a song, restaurant, sex position or activity. Reliving a happy memory can help you both remember what attracted you to each other in the first place, and rekindle the passion.

Book “Us” Time
It may sound cheesy, but it’s easy to let your relationship lose its spark when you’re both busy with other things, so it’s important to make spending time together a priority. Those daily interactions are the key to keeping your connection strong. So whether that means taking 10 minutes to rub each other’s backs before you sit down to dinner, 20 minutes to catch up on your days before bed or 30 to sit down to dinner at least a few nights a week, spending quality time together -- without the BlackBerrys present or TV on -- is essential. And of course, it’s important to make the effort to turn in early at least once a week to connect in another way. But trust us, it won’t require much effort after a while.

For More Relationship Advice, See How to Improve Your Phone Relationship.

-- Paula Kashtan

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