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how to: deal with issues

Every marriage is bound to encounter a few bumps along the road, especially when you're first starting out. We're here to help you out with solutions to couples issues and common newlywed arguments. First, find out about the tried-and-true stuff your parents probably wish they'd known. We've sorted out the newlywed "rules" you can ignore from the relationship mistakes you need to avoid. Learn the right way to handle a fight and the solutions to the most common newlywed arguments. We've also got help for couples issues that are specific to the modern marriage. For example, the four rules of Facebook for couples, how to deal when you're married to a metrosexual, and handling coworker crushes. You can also read our expert Q&A for dealing with all kinds of couples issues. Find tips on making friends as a couple, managing work stress as a pair, and avoiding common newlywed arguments about stuff like cleaning and entertaining. We'll help you solve issues with everyone -- your honey, your couple friends, your in-laws -- and find solutions that work in every part of your life, from the bedroom to the office. From whether it's okay to tell friends about your issues to breaking out of a sex rut, we've got you covered. And don't forget your fellow Nesties! We've pulled together lists of real couple gripes and likes, Nesties' marriage secrets, and their most ridiculous fights -- you're sure to relate to something! Or find even more sympathetic ears with our relationships message board.

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Love Q&A: Dealing with work stress?

The Nest Q&A

His job is taking over our lives -- he’s constantly stressed out when he comes home and it’s taking its toll. How can I help him better separate work life and home life?

Does your husband love -- or at least like -- his work? If not, it may be time for a family meeting. After all, if he’s doing something that he doesn’t like and the stress level is so high that it’s taking its toll on your home life and your relationship, then that’s a recipe for disaster: namely, a grumpy husband and a fed-up wife who dreads him coming home.

If he likes his job then it’s time for a different type of family meeting -- the kind where you figure out how you can support him in his work and how he can be more supportive of your marriage. Maybe he would be less stressed out about work if he knew that he could stay late at the office one night per week or go in on the weekend once in a while without you being upset. Some people find that they need to decompress after work. This can mean taking a hot shower or going for a run (either of which you could do together). For others, it means a solid 30 to 60 minutes alone, sitting in front of the television or in a quiet room.

Try talking to your husband and letting him know how his work stress is trickling into your home life. Let him know that your relationship is more important to you than anything and that you want to work together to find a way to give him the space he needs for his career while also carving out time together at home.

Nestpert: Debby Herbenick, PhD is a research scientist at Indiana University, a sexual health educator at The Kinsey Institute and author of Because It Feels Good: A Woman's Guide to Sexual Pleasure & Satisfaction. She blogs at

-- Debby Herbenick

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