Q.
There's a couple in our circle of friends who always has to "top" whatever is going on in our lives. It drives my husband and me insane. How do we deal?
A.
Perhaps you've heard the phrase "it takes two to tango"? Well, in this case, it takes four. Believe it or not, you and your husband are partly to blame for the catty dynamic. Yes, really. You may be convinced that you don't egg them on, but by dropping hints about the trips you're taking or the things you're buying, you're subtly inviting them to one-up you. Plus, the fact that you even care shows that you're competitive too. The solution? You can take yourselves out of the game. Next time you see the Toppers, let them prattle on about their über-fabulous lives without breathing a single word about your own. By diffusing the situation, you may find that they no longer get under your skin. But, if they keep trying to lure you into competitive chitchat, pull the plug permanently. Life is far too short for frenemies.