Q.
I try not to nag my husband, but sometimes I really need to remind him of the things he needs to do. He says I hassle him, so how can I come across more nicely?
A.
Many of us don’t like being told what to do, so we do the opposite. And the more we’re reminded of chores that need completing, the longer they’ll take to get done. We assume you don’t stand over him wagging a finger in his face, but recognize that he’s annoyed and validate his feelings. Then follow with your feelings: frustration that he’s not listening to you or doing things as soon as you expect them to be done. Phrase your demands differently. For example: “Honey, I know you might not want to think about this now, but we need to review the credit report and I would really appreciate your help.” If you stay calm and communicate, you’ll both get more things done with a smile rather than mutual eye-rolling.
-- The Nest Editors
Oct 06, 2008
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