how to: deal with issues

Every marriage is bound to encounter a few bumps along the road, especially when you're first starting out. We're here to help you out with solutions to couples issues and common newlywed arguments. First, find out about the tried-and-true stuff your parents probably wish they'd known. We've sorted out the newlywed "rules" you can ignore from the relationship mistakes you need to avoid. Learn the right way to handle a fight and the solutions to the most common newlywed arguments. We've also got help for couples issues that are specific to the modern marriage. For example, the four rules of Facebook for couples, how to deal when you're married to a metrosexual, and handling coworker crushes. You can also read our expert Q&A for dealing with all kinds of couples issues. Find tips on making friends as a couple, managing work stress as a pair, and avoiding common newlywed arguments about stuff like cleaning and entertaining. We'll help you solve issues with everyone -- your honey, your couple friends, your in-laws -- and find solutions that work in every part of your life, from the bedroom to the office. From whether it's okay to tell friends about your issues to breaking out of a sex rut, we've got you covered. And don't forget your fellow Nesties! We've pulled together lists of real couple gripes and likes, Nesties' marriage secrets, and their most ridiculous fights -- you're sure to relate to something! Or find even more sympathetic ears with our relationships message board.

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Love Q&A: Spicing Things Up In The Bedroom?

Q.

Sex has become totally rote. How can we break the monotony without spending two hours in bed?

A.

Just a tiny bit of effor can amp up the entire experience. One easy route to intimacy: Turn on the lights, lie side by side naked, and don't touch for a while. You'll be completely focused on (and hungering for) the action once it starts. Or take turns doing things to your partner without receiving any pleasure in return. This tunes you in 100% to your partner, reminding you what they like, not what's routine.

if you're the talk-about-everything type, speak up! Say what you want more of or what you've been fantasixing about. Reminding yourself (and your spouse) that it'll benefit you both should make it less intimidating to share, even if you don't try it right away. And being able to talk about all this increases your overall intimacy.

Another possible tactic to try: Flirt all day like you used to. Kiss and cuddle while you're watching TV or making dinner. Or mix things up! Undress slo-o-owly. Watch a few minutes of a niughtly movie. Break out a fun extra, like a feather, erotic poems, or flavored lube. Too much? This is easy- designate a different spouse than usual to take the lead. Just this tiny tweak can lead to something big.

-- The Nest Editors

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