how to: deal with issues

Every marriage is bound to encounter a few bumps along the road, especially when you're first starting out. We're here to help you out with solutions to couples issues and common newlywed arguments. First, find out about the tried-and-true stuff your parents probably wish they'd known. We've sorted out the newlywed "rules" you can ignore from the relationship mistakes you need to avoid. Learn the right way to handle a fight and the solutions to the most common newlywed arguments. We've also got help for couples issues that are specific to the modern marriage. For example, the four rules of Facebook for couples, how to deal when you're married to a metrosexual, and handling coworker crushes. You can also read our expert Q&A for dealing with all kinds of couples issues. Find tips on making friends as a couple, managing work stress as a pair, and avoiding common newlywed arguments about stuff like cleaning and entertaining. We'll help you solve issues with everyone -- your honey, your couple friends, your in-laws -- and find solutions that work in every part of your life, from the bedroom to the office. From whether it's okay to tell friends about your issues to breaking out of a sex rut, we've got you covered. And don't forget your fellow Nesties! We've pulled together lists of real couple gripes and likes, Nesties' marriage secrets, and their most ridiculous fights -- you're sure to relate to something! Or find even more sympathetic ears with our relationships message board.

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Real-Life Lessons from Reality TV

If you want to know how not to function as a person, look no further than reality TV. With all the backstabbing, the brawling, the Botox -- it’s your go-to guide for despicable behavior. But can we actually learn anything good from these trashy-yet-addictive shows? I accepted the daunting task of investigating these lessons (read: sitting in front of the TV for hours) and then testing them out these lessons in the real real world. Here are the pearls of wisdom I uncovered.

Real Housewives of the OC

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The Real Housewives of Orange County

The Scene: Workaholic Vicki ("I make my own money and I make my own rules") commits to spending more QT with her husband, Donn, doing her part to fill her oft-empty "love tank." The need for this becomes clear during one of the couple’s awkward -- and mostly silent -- date nights, when Vicki admits she doesn’t know Donn’s age! "Are you serious, Vicki?" whimpers a visually crushed Donn.

The Lesson Learned: Relationships don’t nurture themselves.

My Real-Life Try: I surprised my own husband with a reservation at a swanky restaurant (and a babysitter). On a weeknight, no less. The bonding was great, but between the $15 glasses of wine and the steep sitter fee (we tip big when we’re tipsy), it was a costly venture (we dropped about $300 in under three hours -- d’oh!). Love tank: 1; bank account: 0.

Photo: Mitchell Haaseth/NBCUniversal, Inc. / The Nest

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