Luke and Mary: Polyamorous Partners
Luke is married. But he's also dating three other women. And his wife, Mary, is okay with that -- she’s dating other people too.
Luke, 37, and Mary, 40, practice polyamory, so while they're legally married, in love, have two kids, own a home and work full time, they also encourage each other to explore physical and emotional connections with others. Think: marriage with benefits.
It seems like monogamy causes a lot of pain," says Luke. "When people don't have the freedom to explore, they associate their partner with being trapped. I want Mary to explore." Here are their rules: Luke and Mary are completely open with each other about their extracurricular relationships. They only date other poly individuals. The most important rule: They always put the kids first.
Luke and Mary's sex life is as up and down as any other couple's. "Sometimes it's taken pressure off our sex life," Luke says. "Sometimes it's enriched it." The couple say they rarely get jealous -- and if they do, they talk it out. Neither spouse has ever insisted that the other end a relationship. In fact, both are careful to make sure they have "restorative time with others," so they come home to each other ready to give 100 percent. "If Mary found someone she loved and wanted to go away with, it would hurt," says Luke. "But I'd be glad for her too. My love for her is so true that I only want the best possible world for her."
Photo: Courtesy of the couple / The Nest