sparklyhandedbabydoll
TinaHigashi I agree 100% with what you said. Having a tip cheat sheet about the positive would be greater than deception and mistrust. If your having to hide yourself from your in laws maybe it isn't really them that are actually having issues.

h.grant3
I think this is meant to be cute and entertaining. Some people are taking this much to seriously.

CL3542
There's a difference between being embarrassed that you haven't done your laundry yet and completely changing your home as a means to lie to your in-laws. Everyone does some quick, temporary tidying up for any guest, but if you live off of cereal and ice cream and have nothing good in the fridge, you deserve a comment about your eating habits. As far as pictures go, put up the ones you like. There will come a time in your life (perhaps when you start to have children) that you will want all of your family pictures on display. If Cancun pics make you happy for now, leave them up. It's just a picture. I'd hate to have my wedding pictures turn into a form of deceit. I wouldn't be able to enjoy them as much.

shortykyn
This article is extremely disappointing.

Macaws
So far, in all of the articles you've put out on "in-laws", you are making them into monsters, and advocate the couples to become dishonest, deceitful beings to fight them off! Rather than being helpful, your viewpoints are causing damage. Yes, as one reader says "in-laws are family too, remember?" I am happy to know that a lot of the readers are wise enough to disagree with you. Do things with HEART, everything will be alright.

TheBenonas
some of it was a little over the top and some are just common sense. I dont think anyone wants to see what you do with your love one in bed. Its none of their business.

StageGirl
I think there's a balance to be found here between being who you are and showing a little extra respect for your in-laws. It's different for everyone; for me, I try to stash the sex stuff in a drawer just in case I invite the family back (say, to see the sleeping grandbaby), and I do move the alcohol to the back/bottom of the fridge because it's just easier than dealing with another lecture on the evils of alcohol. Our pictures that are important to us stay on display no matter who the company, though, because that's just part of who we are, and I no longer keep the random little gifts I'm given because I've realized the in-laws never remember or notice anyway.

lang107
since we get unexpected visits from my future fil, i don't have the time to do all these things. nor can i just throw everying into a room, and just close the door (he will go and open the door, even the master; he even goes room by room, opening every door and looking in). and we cannot lock our doors, because he will ask what we are hiding, and demand to open the doors.

lang107
what do you do if your outlaw is knowingly stepping over boundaries? we have caught my future father-in-law snooping through our room with his neice. also, he kept asking for a copy of our house keys, but my fiance kept refusing; so when he serviced his car for him, he took his keys and copied it. i feel it is completely useless to have a talk about his boundaries; he already knows he's doing it but still chooses to continue. it'd be different if he didn't realize he was doing it... one time he showed up unexpectedly (even though he lives an hour and a half away), and the blood literally drained from my face (my fil told my fiance); it can't get any more obvious than that but he still continued to do it, even bringing over guests a few times (and when they left, he complained about where we put our recycling area).

gypsye
Well, this does some food for thought for ways to "make things easier" but there is a BIG difference between attempting to get along better and throwing yourself under the train to grease the wheels. In a former situation I had "outlaws" ( we were not married, so they were not in-laws!) My faith was completely ignored. It reached the point where when I opened a gift that was representing THEIR faith, I would simply hand it back to his mother and say " You need to give to some one for whom it is appropriate." So pick your comfort level, share with your spouse, and figure out what works for the two of you. Once that is established inform all the parents ( or buddies, sisters, etc. aunts- any family member can be disrespectful of your space) Maybe in a public space, so it does not become a territory dispute on anyone's turf. If that does not get the message through, change the locks or get the keys back and when they show up, treat it like an badly timed phone call "Sorry, I can not. I'll get in touch and we can plan for a good time." Best of all- set these boundaries BEFORE it is problem.

mston31
My husband graduated college over a year ago and has been living on his own for 5 years (2 of them with me) and his mother still lakes it upon herself to look into our bed side tables and medicine cabinet. She is VERY catholic and does not agree with the use of condoms or birth control (we use both). However, she has expressed her distain for us getting married/ having children too young. Sometimes, hiding things is just the best options.

sassyracing79
I have to say my snooping MIL was more embarrassed then we were when she found a picture of me meant only for my husbands eyes and some other fun stuff in our nightstand. She stoped snooping though!

Caseyh1
My Mother in law never misses an opportunity to let me know I can't decorate. and in the 3 months we have been married her and her husband have stopped by 5 times uninvited, unannounced. just walked in, asked for drinks started flipping through the channels or my magazines. I wouldn't go to the extent to hide things from them...sometimes my husband and I want them to find something or walk in on something so they will get it.

sirensong13
This article is ridiculous. I never hid my style when I lived at home. I am not about to do it in my own home. It's not like I leave sexy toys laying around but if I want to have a picture of my girlfriends and I having a drink on the beach out in the living room I will. If my husband hates the figurine my cousin gave us then why display it? Our house is our space. Our parents have their space and we don't tell them how to decorate it. Ya, ok I might clean a little deeper if I know they are coming but that is where I draw the line.

ajk821
My soon to be in-laws ALWAYS comment on the cleanlinest of our home, even when it is clean they still find something to comment on. (Like our dogs being on the couch) How do i make it stop???

SasseyBride-to-be
do you think you can measure the right man by how much you dislike his parents....hmmm food for thought

Marilynnc
Wow. If his parents ever started snooping in my house, that would be the last time they set foot in my door. I already cannot stand them. And as for them going in my bedroom, that is a no-no. My mother raised me to consider the bedroom a private area. I don't let people just waltz in when they please. A few close girlfriends in my room is different. They would be in there helping me pick out clothes or talking to me whil I clean up a bit. His friends don't even go in our room because I may have some unmentionable lying around that they don't need to see. This article is ridiculous. And who keeps 15 bottles of alcohol on display anyway?

Laura Ann
My inlaws live with us, so it's hard creating a space that totally belongs to my husband and I. Due to the lack of personal space, I've given up trying to please them. I mean, if they can't respect what space we do have, why go all out and decorate to please them?

URMyHeaven2202000
I totally agree with this article and find that it points out a lot of good points that I haden't even thought of. For all of you out there with heavely inlaws... good for you... some of us aren't that lucky. And the one poster was right, they are little things to do to keep the peace, and my hellish inlaws won't change and pissing them off by showing them my alcohol collection or that I don't apreciate the gifts she INSISTS on getting us is not going to maintain our relationship at all. I wouldn't even concider it lying as much as putting your best foot forward, learn what they want to see/hear and give it to them so they'll be happy, trust you're happy and leave you alone!

cutie_pi314
If my in-laws were snooping in our night stand, I think what they find in there is absolutely irrelevant. Why should we hide our things when we should have the absolute expectation of privacy in our own home? If anyone should be ashamed, it should be snooping in-laws and not the married couple who *gasp* have sex and *gasp* enjoy it? As it is, I don't have that kind of in-laws. I agree with most of the comments that this article should be encouraging openness and communication, not sneakiness and deceit. I feel bad for those people who think they need to hide who they are from their family. In-laws are family, remember?

Scllc
Lol, this was a great article to read. And good food for thought. I've yet to hide things when my mother-in-law visits but I might just think about it next time......

fullen
I dont think i should hide my things just because his parents are coming over. We are who we are and they should accept that. Sure we dont need to have sex toys or anything like that in our living room, but seriously we are adults and were married. This is not the 1950s anymore get with the program.

Tasknkp
LOL this is hilarious.. I agree with the one poster who said she's more comfortable with her in-laws seeing her stuff than her parents.. when my mom came to visit I had to clean up and store things away but my in-laws see everything and don't care!

Allison Rhea
I don't agree with this article... I definately would NOT bring things out from the closet that my mother-in-law gave me to display them just for her to see. If I don't like things she gives me (which I don't), I get rid of it. Fast! Otherwise she will think I actually like that stuff and continue to give me things. But yes, definately make sure they do not have access to your condoms and lube!!

ScottsNLove
I really enjoyed this article, when you have a mother-in-law from the depths of hell...i'm not even exaggerating...you would do almost anything to keep the peace! Even if it means hiding your whole identity! It's sad, I know:)

crozette
I thought this was a cute article...no need to take it too seriously. My inlaws live in town though so we see them often. I do disagree with "showing off the tchotchkes"... maybe they'll eventually take a hint and stop giving them!

posniv95
While my inlaws are not offended by any of the items mentioned in this article, I am embarrassed if MY parents come in and there's a large selection of hard liquor or if they knew we were having sex... (OK I'm currently pregnant, I think they figured that one out, but I still don't want them finding condoms or lube) I know my parents well enough to know they won't open my nightstand drawer without being told to, but at the same time I do put the liquor away. It says something different if it's out on display than if they find it in a cupboard.

liza&matt
If my inlaws go snooping throught the parts of the house they will be in-like the living room, kitchen, spare bath/bed. they wont find anything. And if they are trying to find out what is in my goodie drawer-i wont have to get my husband to check his family. I will!! Thankfully I have wonderful inlaws and they love me, so i dont worry about any of these things. Mainly because they think i am great for finding their son/brother. But i agree with everyone, i wouldnt advocate lying to them-that is a quick recipe to creat bad feelings that could last for a really long time. i would rather not have that in my marriage. happy holidays to everyone!!

csf775
Ha, wow. I'm only 20 and I wouldn't do this to my inlaws. Except maybe hiding some sex stuff, the rest can stay.

pank07
I totally agree. I don't care what my in-laws think and i'm not about to put on a show just for them.

TinaHigashi
I agree with you all in my dislike of this article. I have found that most problems come from trying to be fake with in-laws, after all they are human too. My mother in law was happy to know that I'm making wise and healthy decisions about sex (like birth control and lubricant) because that is allowed and expected once you are MARRIED. I'll admit the title of the article intrigued me, but I would have been much happier to read tips like: - stock up on their favorite foods or make a family favorite dish so they'll feel at home and wanted. - make sure you have enough upright seating in your living room (50+ parents don't think that bean bag is so trendy) If any knot officials read this- tell the writer to get a clue, and quit advocating dishonesty which breeds bad relationships.

celishia
This article is ridiculous. Hide your wall pictures? Prepare for snooping? Hide your bar? If your in laws have no idea who you are or who their child is then maybe it's time they did. If my in laws snooped through our things, my husband better a huge and serious chat about boundaries. You should be yourself, your in laws are just happy that their son/daughter is happy.

Mrs_W_Pookie
Does the author of this article assume everyone who has their in-laws over has just gotten two feet out of their parents' door? That they're right out of college? I think these tips are unrealistic. You're essentially telling people not to be themselves in front of their in-laws.

Kias4
Yeah I thought this article was a bit over the top. How many married couples have to worry about bongs laying around their house and copious bottles of liquor everywhere? And honestly, a lot of the suggestions seem dishonest to me. The whole article encouraged couples to put on a facade and convince their parents that they're something they are not. Not cool.

celishia
This article is ridiculous. Hide your wall pictures? Prepare for snooping? Hide your bar? If your in laws have no idea who you are or who their child is then maybe it's time they did. If my in laws snooped through our things, my husband better a huge and serious chat about boundaries. You should be yourself, your in laws are just happy that their son/daughter is happy.

PennyLane8405
lol. I so agree. Of course, I do all this same stuff when my parents come over. A quick clean. Throw that unfolded laundry into the guest room and shut the door....

jm78607
This was an interesting article...funny with a few neat tips. However I disagree with going thru your bedside table drawer in order to keep them from finding anything. My opinion is if they are that nosey then they deserve what they find...and although that might lead to a few awkward moments...i can promise they most certainly won't snoop again!

jm78607
This was an interesting article...funny with a few neat tips. However I disagree with going thru your bedside table drawer in order to keep them from finding anything. My opinion is if they are that nosey then they deserve what they find...and although that might lead to a few awkward moments...i can promise they most certainly won't snoop again!

salukis2
I also try to do the laundry so mom in-law doesn't see any unmentionables or thinks I don't do the laundry enough. Trying to hide stuff? I have an empty plastic storage tote in the storage closet under the stairs labeled (Holiday) to hide all the secret stuff and know my in-laws won't go through. That includes condoms, private stuff, TTC journals, etc. I always leave doors to bedrooms/offices closed. That way, I'll hear if they ever go in there... Sometimes I'll lock them too. It works especially well if you have the doors that can be unlocked from the outside with a bobby pin or alike. ;)