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Help Me Survive Your Kid’s Birthday Party

Even though you may not be thinking babies yet, chances are you’ve gotten invited to your share of friends’ birthday bashes for their little ones. Here our our biggest pee-wee party gripes and how to make things easier on the kid-free guests.

42% of Nesties say going to loud, child-packed party spaces drives them insane!

  • Give us some child-free wıngmen (and women)
    Take pity on the people who don’t speak baby talk, and please include others of our kind at the party. Then we at least have a conversation buddy when everyone else is talking potty training.

  • Please, no guıtar-playıng clowns
    “Hello everybody! So glad to see you! Hello to Alex! So glad to see you! Hello to Sydney! So glad to see you!” Now imagine listening to that same verse 15 times in a row for every tot in the room. It’s okay for parents to stomach because they’re used to singing these bizarre songs, but for the rest of us, it’s simply painful.
  • Allow us a deserved tıme-out
    If you’re not a parent and you find yourself surrounded by balloons and odd magicians, you’ll need time-outs as much as the kids do. So cut us some slack and turn on the game in another room nearby so we can pop our heads in to check on the score. Even better: Offer booze in that room too.
  • Spare us from gıft overload
    Insisting the kid-free set stay for the present-opening part is like being sent into the penalty box just as your team is going into overtime. Why? Because we’re not ogling Dora dolls and baby cell phones like the other parents. Let us finish our cake and slip out the door. Hey, we brought a good gift too; cut us some slack!
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Wow. If kid parties are so very unbearable for you, decline the invitation. Nice to know, too, that we moms only talk about potty training. Didn't realize that when I became a mother I lost my ability to converse intelligently with other adults.

by sarahdwillis on May 14, 2010

It can seem that way. We get it. You gave birth and are now a mommy. Congrats. We haven't and that's okay to. We don't speak Mommy. I would hope we can be supportive without being made to feel that we haven't "gotten there yet. It's okay not to have kids to.

by Adrini76 on Jul 15, 2010

This is soooo true. I love my mom friends but when we get together, the topic turns quickly to breast feeding or diapers or something where I can't contribute a thing. Luckily, they are pretty good about making their kids' parties adult friendly.

by therockisblinding05 on Jul 20, 2010

my sister had her baby about 6 months ago, i dont know if its because he's my nephew or something but i get just as excited as she does when he does something totally awesome. i love to talk about changing and feeding him too. i dont have any children yet but that doesnt stop me from enjoying child friendly songs and such.

by july24mrshill on Aug 09, 2010

I can totally relate to this. My husband and I got married in our late 20s, where as many of our friends got married in their early 20s. So, while we are still enjoying being newlyweds, they are settling down and starting families. We are often invited to kid b-day parties, and often get left out of the conversations because people assume we either don't know anything about the subject or don't have any interest in it. While we may not have any interest in it, we are not completely uneducated. My husband is a teacher, we have 3 nephews and a niece, and I have spent many years babysitting. When we do share our opinions, no one takes them seriously because we are currently childless. That's what annoys me more than anything at these kind of parties.

by kellygraham17 on Aug 30, 2010

I completely agree, actually. While I realize most people don't lose the ability to speak intelligently with other adults, as someone posted, they do seem to lose the ability to turn off the "Oh my God, my baby is the best thing EVER!" mode. We get it--you love your kid. Chances are, we love your kid, too. But not being able to go beyond that makes for very bored party guests who truly consider not coming back to your house until they have children or until your little wonder leaves for college and you can be accessible again. Just a thought.

by robandbecky09 on Sep 17, 2010

Who's the party for? The child, or the adult who doesn't have kids yet... come on people... a kids party is what it is... I agree, decline the invite if you're expecting any different. Would I ask you to have a clown at your bbq so my kid can be entertained at an adult party? no.

by Katehenn on Oct 22, 2010

I agree with most of this. However, I happen to like to watch kids opening presents. And please, please, PLEASE, don't have your kid's b-day party disguised as a cookout. The invite went something like, 'we're having a cookout, can you come? yes? that's great! Oh, by the way, it's also our son's birthday, so you might want to bring a little something', so you're suckered into buying a present for the little brat just after you agreed you'd go to the cookout. Ugh.

by engr_tam on Oct 24, 2010

This post must be based on my life. I have several older inlaws who have young children under the age of 5. Not only are my husband and I invited to every single birhtday party, even though we are childless, but we are guilted into going to every single one. As if the one or two year old will notice that we are not there. In my opinion such people should either have separate kid parties and adult parties or they should not invite people who don't have kids themselves.

by EmilyC3 on Jan 04, 2011

Because we’re not ogling Dora dolls and baby cell phones like the other parents. Let us finish our cake and slip out the door. Hey, we brought a good gift too; cut us some slack!Wedding Gowns prom gowns Bridal Gowns

by addtt on May 20, 2011

This posting on helping one to survive a kid’s birthday party is cool. I am sure many who are not parents get invited to kids' birthday parties. The tips listed are useful. When one is not married it can be worse if the people around are all talking about kids. I think if you hold your kid's birthday party, it is good if you can arrange for Limo bus service for the guests.

by D4n13LA on Nov 18, 2011