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My Married Life: Can a Marriage Just Coast?

When is a good marriage good enough?

In case you haven't been reading this blog religiously, I'll catch you up on my career details by saying this: I work in TV. Don't get excited. My position is decidedly low on glamour. We're talking intense hours, bizarre tasks (did I mention it's reality TV?) and egos running rampant. Right now, I'm reaching that phase in the production schedule where I'm completely wrecked. It's all I can do to drag my tired ass to work, do a decent job, be polite to everyone and get home without passing out on the subway. Every once in a while, when I'm in this pathetic state, Holly will initiate a heart-to-heart about some minor issue in our marriage (for example, an in-depth analysis of our different communication styles). So this time, when she lobbed one of her deep convo grenades my way, I said, "Babe, we're good right? Our relationship is solid? We love each other? We have no major issues?" "Yes, yes, yes and yes," she responded. "So can't we please just coast a little bit right now?" I asked. Luckily, Holly got it. She agreed that everything is good between us and that she should let things "breathe more, in general." This is something I've actually talked about with other guys at work -- enough that I now know it's a common sentiment among men. So at what point is it okay to press "pause" on the lifelong pursuit of the perfect marriage and just enjoy your “good enough” marriage? Men, women, discuss.

-- Jack