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New Year's Resolutions for Couples

Just putting your relationship on the list is probably a step in the right direction.

I've probably already told you that I'm a big list maker, but, oh, how I love a good list! There's something so satisfying about putting down everything I need to do in a single list and then checking off things as I get them done. Holly calls me "The Unabomber" because of my huge collection of filled-to-the-margins notebooks brimming with my lists (which she calls "manifestos"). My point? Obviously, I'm a New Year's resolution maker. And it occurred to me that it would be cool to make at least one resolution about my marriage.

So I did a quick search and found this list. The good news? Holly and I do almost everything on it already (excuse me while I stop typing to pat myself on the back for kicking ass in marriage) … except for No. 4 on the list: "Learn your partner’s 'love language' and find some way to show him or her that you love him/her in your partner’s own love language."

Even though the words used (ah-hem, "love language") make me cringe a little (a lot actually), No. 4 is definitely a resolution we could stand to work on, and I think it’s a common issue in most marriages. What Holly wants or needs in order to feel loved is completely different from what I want or need. She needs things like compliments and affection (sex, bafflingly, does not count, by the way). I, on the other hand, need to be listened to without criticism and without being interrupted. Sexy stuff, huh? (Listen, I'm going to make at least one resolution that is sexy, but that one is none of your friggin’ business.)

So in addition to the 10 resolutions on the list I found, can you guys think of a good New Year's resolution for a married couple?

-- Jack

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