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My Married Life: Sleeping Separately

In this Apartment Therapy post, couples debated the pros and cons of separate sleeping. While both sides were very adamant, I have to admit I'm torn. On the one hand, I sleep next to a grizzly-bear-level snorer who, judging from the flailing, jabbing, and kicking, fights armies of relentless zombies on a nightly basis. Add to this his propensity for stealing covers and the fact that his snores wake HIM at least twice a night -- inspiring him to sit up and yell, "What?" -- and you can see why I might occasionally fantasize about a bed of my own.

On the other hand, my grandparents had separate bedrooms. And even though my grandmother said it was because Big Poppa snored, I concluded (as a 6-year-old) that it was because the two weren't very lovey-dovery. As a teenager, I modified that judgment to: They never do it. And even though several AT commenters pointed out (rightly) that  sleeping and sex are two different things, if I hear that a couple sleeps in separate beds, I still have a hard time believing they have an active sex life.

Personally, I'm just not willing to give up those tender little moments with Jack, right before we drift off to sleep, sex or no sex. It's all the little things that happen while we're lying there together -- talking about funny things that happened during the day, snuggling, laughing. You know, the glue. Marriage glue. True, my mind could change down the road. But for now, I'll continue attempting to wrestle my grizzly-man into a spoonable position.

What do you guys think about sleeping in separate beds? Kiss of death or the secret to wedded bliss?

-- Holly

See More: Couple Issues , Love & Sex , Newlywed Central