Become our fan on Facebook Follow us on Twitter

Hot Topics -- Join the Discussion!

"How do you deal with pushy in-laws."

"Do you have a cleaning schedule?"

"Has marriage changed your relationship?"
Married Life

“What are your financial goals?"
Money Matters

Home Buying Help – Money Management Tools – Home Decorating Ideas – Free Recipes

"The Things I Want In a Spouse" List

Did you end up sticking to yours?

Dave is off doing standup; it's just me this week, ladies!

So, this past Veterans' Day, Dave and I hung out with my co-worker -- who is in the Air Force -- and some of his crew. A bunch of them knew about this blog. (Exciting, right?) They assumed Dave and I had it all together (um...yeah) and started hitting us up for dating advice. One soldier in particular -- a 44-year-old single father of three who has never been married -- was curious. Apparently, he had a list of traits for his potential spouse, too! Unfortunately, his list read more like a to-do list of chores:

1. Cooks
2. Cleans
3. Splits rent
4. Picks up dry cleaning

Ok, I added that last one myself, but you get the idea.

By the end of our conversation with said soldier, I think it's safe to say Dave and I were both biting our tongues. Dave suggested this guy scratch the whole dating scene and just mail-order a geisha. I think he got the point across.

When you're single, especially throughout your 20s, it's easy to start making a list of qualities you want in partner. Some items on the list are universal: Tall, handsome, funny,! Others are a little more subjective. For example, I always envisioned being with a man who wore a suit everyday, working hard to climb that corporate ladder. After meeting Dave, I quickly came to realize he was not that man, and I'd have to revise that list. Turns out Dave is even better than the "dream man" I'd envisioned -- and I don't think I could have ever dreamed up Dave, for that matter. So much for my list.

So, here's my advice for our Air Force friend and for everyone who is single longer than they want to be: You may have to sacrifice a little of yourself to find the love you want. It's not all about you and your list. I'm not suggesting you throw out your list. Just be willing to provide a little leeway.

Married ladies: Did you have a checklist before you met your husband -- and did you end up revising it? What's your advice for single ladies (and Air Force dudes!) who are, well, picky?

Stephanie Tsoflias is a reporter for WPIX in New York City. You can follow her on Facebook and Twitter (@lifeofareporter). Dave Siegel is a writer and stand up comedian in New York City. Visit his website,, and follow him on Twitter (@StandUpDave).

See Also:

Unconventional Marriages: See How These Real Couples Make It Work

Are You Screwing Up Your Relationship?